Woman advertises post-divorce garage sale on Craigslist

Everything must go!


HOUSTON – Everything must go! A Texas woman is ready to clean house after divorcing her husband of four years, accord to a Craigslist ad.

The ad reads "Divorce garage sale -- Get him out of my life," according to KPRC. In it, the woman states that she finally divorced her "worthless, cheating, abusive husband" after "two long years" and wants a clean slate by selling their things.

The woman is selling items such as a living room set, a queen-sized bed and mattress, a TV stand, bunk bed, clothes and tools.

"If you've ever been completely screwed over by an ex, please come support my garage sale and help me get rid of this (expletive) so I can move on with my life," the woman wrote.

The ad has since been removed from Craiglist, but here was the full text when it was up:

“So after 2 long years, I have FINALLY been able to divorce my worthless, cheating, abusive husband. During that time, I had the distinct pleasure of paying for TWO entire households because he lost his job due to commiting (sic.) a felony and couldn't support himself, so guess who demanded in court docs that I keep him in the lifestyle he'd become accustomed to???

“Fortunately, everyone eventually saw through his (expletive), and I'm free. I am also WAY more broke. But hell, divorce is expensive because it's worth it. Was it worth the more than $50,000 to get rid of him? Yes. Am I going to be eating ramen until I'm 50? Probably also yes. It's fine. Single ramen tastes better than married filet mignon anyday (sic.). 

“That said, I have an entire household worth of (expletive) that needs to be GONE. I don't want to look at it. I don't want the memories. And I'd like to recoup some of the thousands upon thousands of dollars I spent on his sorry ass.

“So, SATURDAY, February 10th is it. The "freedom from (expletive)" garage sale.

"I have ALL the things.

“Living room set, queen size bed/mattress, a wooden bunk bed that breaks down into 2 twins, an entire kitchens worth of things, dining table, some clothes, a TV stand, tools, linens, pretty much everything it takes to keep a lazy worthless human being in a state of comfort for a year.

“I also have a ton of kids games and toys (boys or unisex). They mostly belonged to my kids, but easily could have been his since the maturity levels are about the same :)

“Which reminds me, I do have a playstation (sic.) and an Xbox. And a bunch of other electronic-y stuff. Ha. Selling that too. (Don't judge me, the guy tried to take my DOG... who does that?!?!)

“Oh, and I'm selling the grandmothers (sic.) silverware. Because he deserves it. F him. Maybe he'll learn not to get bartenders pregnant and hit his wife. 

“If you've EVER been completely screwed over by an ex, PLEASE come support my garage sale and help me get rid of this (expletive) so I can move on with my life. 

“You can even help me burn the pictures, and my wedding dress, if you like. There will be mimosas. And doughnuts. Because I'll be up early and life is stressful. 

“And I'll even let you pay me electronically (Venmo or PayPal) if you don't have cash. Yay technology.

“The address is (redacted). It's in (redacted) neighborhood off of (redacted). 

“Come stop by. Buy something. Support moving forward and getting rid of (expletive). Or just get a great deal on a couch. Think of it as a party and THIS is YOUR personal invite!

“Maybe bring some champagne or OJ, cuz it sounds like we may need it based on the response I'm getting.

“This is happening this Saturday from 7:30 AM until I need a nap... so maybe 2ish?”