ORLANDO, Fla. – Nearly nine years after the deadly shooting at Pulse nightclub, families of the victims and survivors are preparing to walk through the building one final time before its planned demolition.
The city of Orlando is offering private tours of the site to loved ones ahead of the club’s transformation into a permanent memorial.
Christine Leinonen, whose son Christopher Leinonen was among the 49 people killed in the 2016 attack, said this year feels different. For the first time, she plans to step inside the building where her son lost his life.
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“This year is so different than any other year,” Leinonen said. “If this had been a normal year, I wouldn’t even have gone to anything.”
Leinonen, who rarely attends annual remembrance ceremonies, told News 6 she felt a strong need to enter the space where her son died.
“They’re letting us go through it, so of course I want to see it,” she said. “I want to see the inside.”
The opportunity to enter the nightclub is deeply emotional for Leinonen, who reflected on why the moment holds such personal significance.
“For me, it’s important to go inside because that’s where my son died,” she said. “My son didn’t die running out of the building or at the hospital. My son literally died on that dance floor.”
She admits she doesn’t know how she’ll react once inside.
“There’s going to be a lot of sadness, I’m sure,” she said. “Maybe I’ll feel nothing. Maybe I’ll go through there and feel nothing at all.”
When asked if the experience might bring closure, Leinonen responded firmly, “No, no, no, no. I’m never going to get any closure. There’s never going to be any closure.”
Still, she said, she feels a duty to her son.
“I figure if Christopher could endure all of that, the least I can do, that I owe him, is to walk,” she said. “I want to feel like where he was when he took his last breath. What did he see?”