This 'child-free millennials' rant inspired by Disney pretzel will make you cringe so hard
Grab some popcorn and settle in!
Disney World can be truly magical.
Unless you’re the mother of a 3-year-old who just missed out on a Mickey pretzel.
It’s hard to tell who was more upset: the mom or the toddler. (Was the boy even that sad?) The mother said this incident -- we'll fill you in soon -- "made him cry," but the tears seem to be coming from another direction.
Twitter user @JenKatWrites uncovered this post just last week, and it appears to be taken from Facebook. The original poster supposedly wrote it in September.
Is it real? We hope not. Is it satire? Got to hope so, but it’s pretty unhinged either way.
Regardless, we love the Twitter reactions that followed.
We’ll blur out some key details and foul language from this poster, who really struggles with her indoor voice -- are the caps necessary, or is her caps lock button stuck? -- when addressing the topic of “childless [people]” and how they’re "ruining" Disney for children everywhere.
(Who’s ruining what for who?)
You can click or tap here to view the original post. You’ll just want to be aware that this is unedited, so again, language.
Here are some funny Twitter responses that we enjoyed particularly.
Speaking as a parent with a 3yo, Ugh, why would you take a 3yo to Disney?? They won't remember or appreciate it. Also, how can you go to Disney and expect to not stand in line.— Eric B Gator (He/Him) (@weregator) July 19, 2019
Also if she has a 3yo, odds are she's a millennial herself.
I like the idea that all mothers with children should get to skip the lines, as if that wouldn’t create its own line of moms and kids— JenniFEAR KathleEEK! 👻 (@JenKatWrites) July 19, 2019
DISNEY is for FAMILIES, by which I mean MOMS who have been driven into the arms of DESPAIR by their hellspawn BABIES that have been named AIDAN, TUCKER, DYLAN, or SKYLAR.— Jack Guignol (@ScholarOfDecay) July 19, 2019
Gimme that pretzel, you slapper! Little Tanner needs his num-nums.
I distinctly remember an venue outside of the safari at animal kingdom that exclusively serves margaritas and mojitos. How is this not for childless adults?— GrumpyAdam🥃🥃 (@GrumpAdam) July 22, 2019
“I hate childless women” is “I hate my choices and regret them.”— Robert Bohl (@robertbohl) July 19, 2019
Holy balls of fire! If my toddler starts acting like an entitled jerk because she has to work/wait for something, she just doesn't get it. It's how life works! Ur #1 priority as parent - raise a well prepared and adjusted person. Now someone pls hand me mother of the year award!— Pitter patter (@anarushka) July 21, 2019
I have children and I STILL go to Disney without them. Next time I am going to wear my shorty shorts and buy all the pretzels. 😫🤨🤓😈😱— Katie Sutton (@MommyMercy) July 25, 2019
As a single person with no kids who goes to Disneyworld all the time, this is making me feel extremely powerful.— Mitchell Stankowicz (@mstankow) July 20, 2019
My personal favorite: “and I just can’t tell him that he can’t do something. Because it’s HIS VACATION TOO!!!”— Angel Campey (@YesReallyAngel) July 23, 2019
Pray tell. WHAT does a three year old need a vacation from, or for? 🤣
Or we could just ban these childless people.
Sounded like a pretty logical solution though.
At last check, the post had been retweeted more than 14,000 times with more than 60,000 likes. Grab some popcorn and settle in, because we could have added Twitter reactions to this story all day.
h/t Scary Mommy
[ READ NEXT: Learn how Fast Passes work so that you don't have to wait hours in line for ANYTHING | The Wonderful Walls of Disney: A trend that was never meant to be | So this is love: All the most romantic things to do at Disney ]
Graham Media Group 2019